Maître
de: “Yes, we have your reservation. Can
you show me your vaccine passport?”
Woman:
“No. I have a religious exemption.”
Maître
de: “I’m sorry, but that doesn’t work here at Café Capitulation.”
Woman:
“I’m sad to hear that” (turns to walk away).
Maître
de: “By the way, what religion are you?”
Woman
(pulls out a doll from her purse that looks exactly like the maître de.):
“Voodoo.”
Maître
de: “Ah, a table has just become available.
Right this way, madam.”
__________________
Robin:
“Holy smoke, Batman! Could it be that
the villain Bane wearing a mask and the Joker blowing up hospitals in our
previous episodes was predictive programming for what we are living in now?”
Bruce
Wayne (wearing a Batman costume): “Best not to pursue it further, Robin. We have stock in the pharmaceutical companies
ourselves.”
_________________
Reporter:
“So why are you only now warning us about the very mRNA technology that you
helped develop rather than blowing the whistle back when you were creating this
bioweapon?”
Dr.
Frankenstein: “I needed more test subjects.
Ending up with only one mutant could’ve been an anomaly.”
_________________
Sportscaster:
“Here comes the tennis star, Boris Williams.
How have you won 40 majors and are still winning at age 50?”
Boris
Williams (wearing a billion-dollar smile): “I have no idea. Be sure to take your boosters.”
Sportscaster:
“But you were denied entry into tournaments back during the vaccine mandates
because you refused to take them. What
happened to all your competition?”
Boris
Williams: “I have no idea. Be sure to
take your boosters.”
________________
CEO:
“Ladies and Gentlemen, I present to you the sole survivor of our 25th
booster shot. (Big Pharma stockholders
give the poor emaciated wretch a standing ovation).
CEO:
“Unfortunately, it looks like we have put ourselves out of business.”
(Dead
silence).
________________
21st
Century Heroes in the Headlines:
“Drone
Operator wins Congressional Medal of Honor.”
“Stowaway
on Billionaire’s Spaceship Reveals Truth about Flat Earth Theory.”
“Developer
of Masks for Dogs Wins Nobel Prize in Medicine.”
“Developer
of Masks for Cats Remains in Stable Condition at Local Hospital.”
________________
Final
Episode: “Riddle me this, Batman--Do you mean to tell me that you looked the
other way when all those people were being murdered in exchange for money
that is no longer worth anything?”